Gemballa Mig-U1

How long, o Lord, how long? Look, I know there's always room for improvement, but to a Ferrari Enzo? Why, because you're so damn smart that you can do better than Ferrari? And when you're done, you've got better drivers sitting around than Michael Schumacher? Are you mental?

Well, I guess the people at Gemballa think they're better than Ferrari, which makes sense, because I remember Gemballa winning all those Grands Prix constructors championships and wiping the floor with other competitors at the Mille Miglia, and .. oh wait. No, this is Gemballa, the German "supertuner" (oo, aren't we special).

The Gemballa molested Enzo is officially known as the Gemballa Mig-U1, supposedly because it was "jet-fighter inspired". Why they went with Mig (which is correctly spelled MiG, but that's the least of these buys transgressions) is beyond me, when there are more lyrical aircraft company names out there ... Maybe it's because the Soviets never believed in copyrights?

The Gemballa Mig-U1 was supposed to be at the Dubai Motor Show but didn't make it. So, der Germans released a bunch of new photos and deets on their, er, car. The Gemballa Mig-U1 has a bunch of supposed "signature touches" such as a roof scoop, jet-thruster exhaust surrounds and black alloy wheels.

There's a widebody kit with a restyled nose, a ducted hood, more vents up front as well as behind the wheels. There's fender-top gills and a big honkin' rear wing. Gemballa alleges that these new aero bits give an additional 35 kilograms of downforce at the front and 85 kg at the rear.

On the inside there's black leather and quilted red Alcantara with rosso piping and stitching. (What's the difference between red and rosso?) Gemballa has also "revised" the center console and a new infotainment system featuring a 950-watt amplifier, seven-inch touchscreen, navigation, DVD changer and an iPod jack. Because you know, if you've got the money and taste for one of these you KNOW you're going to want every last man woman and child for MILES to hear what you think counts as good "music".

Gemballa has seen fit to only mess with the ECU and the exhaust system on the stock Enzo mill. Just as well. Said plant now puts out 700 horsepower. The suspension is probably OEM (says the source) but Gemballa did slap on some lightweight GTR Racing wheels that are 16 kg (35 pounds) lighter versus the stock wheel set. So at least they got the unsprung mass thing.

Price? Nada as of yet, but Gemballa threatened that " ... at most 25 Enzos will get the Mig-makeover. "

All I can say is: These people should be hunted down with dogs and beaten with saps.

Source: AutoBlog