This Ferrari 308 Replica Is Nearly As Bad As Its Sales Pitch

A few weeks ago I talked about some of my oddball bucket list goals, among which was owning a really bad Pontiac Fiero kit car. This week’s classified find isn’t a Fiero, but I think it still might qualify as a positively terrible kit car that’s so bad, you just might want to own it. For a little while. Then kill it. Violently.

If you want a legitimate Ferrari 308 from the 1980s, it’s going to set you back around $70,000 for a decent example. Fear not, because you can have this clone-close 1986 308 replica selling in Wickliffe, Ohio for tens of thousands of dollars less. Well, presumably less, because it’s currently on eBay with a reserve-not-met bid price of $5100.

There’s no mention of what the reserve might be, but as I type this there are 14 bidders with a few days left in the auction. The seller states (in all caps so you know it’s legit) that no expense was spared in this build, so don’t be surprised if this cracks $6000. I say $6000 because that’s a decent price for a 1986 Pontiac Firebird with a V8, which is what this faux Ferrari actually is. A Firebird? Yup, and it even has T-tops. And it gets even better.

The seller (again, in all caps) boldly states that this particular kit is not a Fiero, but rather the “real deal” based on a Firebird chassis. Let that sink in for just a moment, because I find this whole thing to be absolutely hilarious. The best part comes at the end, with the seller stating this replica “is the closest thing to a real Ferrari without any of the high dollar cost.” So let’s take a look at these claims.

We have a front-engined car with four seats, T-tops, and an automatic transmission. That matches perfectly with the 308’s mid-engine two-seat layout, targa roof and gated five-speed manual, if by perfectly you mean are you f-ing kidding? Hopefully the V8 is at least the pushrod 5.7-litre, but I’d wager good money there’s a 305 cubic-inch 5.0-litre under the bonnet, which for that era would’ve made somewhere around 180bhp.

The ‘similarities’ to a 308 don’t stop there. Those wheels are most definitely not Pontiac-spec GTA wheels with prancing horse emblems stuck over the firebird centre caps. The faux wood dash with GM buttons, gauges, and 85mph speedometer could fool even the concours judges. If they’re blind drunk. The best part of this replica by far is the unicorn on the steering wheel. Yes, that’s right. Unicorn. Take that 308 owners.

The ironic part is that, despite the claim of this being the real deal, 308 replicas built from Fieros are far better than this attempt. I’ve seen some truly impressive Fiero-based 308 replicas that would actually pass for a 308, and with a supercharged 3.8 V6 swapped into the Fiero’s mid-mount engine bay, performance is just as good if not better than the Ferrari.

Yes, I have a weird desire to own a bad Fiero kit car, but honestly, I wouldn’t touch this car for half the current bid price. It’s not the car, which if I’m honest isn’t that bad. Rather, it’s the presentation that has me completely turned off.

Aside from completely talking out of his backside, the seller seems to think eight-year-old photos taken with an old-school camera are good enough to sell this “real deal.” I’d bet a million bucks this seller wears a plaid sport coat and can get anyone approved for a loan in 15 minutes. Even the car is sad and desperate to find a new owner - just look at that face.

Still, I couldn’t resist sharing this small bit of eBay gold. It’s like when you get bad food at a restaurant and you want your mates to taste it anyway, just to make sure it really is that bad. It is really that bad, right?