Tales from Sales: The Up System

“You’re up, Matt!” was a phrase never heard at my place of work. In some dealerships, there is an Up System, a rotating schedule dictating who gets to talk to the next customer that strolls onto the lot – existing patrons being the exception to the rule. The system works, allowing a salesman to gauge his responsibilities based on the flow of traffic (or lack thereof) that day. You’re the last guy “up” and only two people have walked through the door by noon? Better work the phones, then.

Where I worked, there was no Up System. A free for all. Every man for himself. Sauve qui peut. A guy could take five customers in a row, if he was quick enough. You’d better be able to handle all five, though; if you spread yourself too thin and failed to maintain a decent closing ratio, it’s a guarantee you’d be called on the carpet and read the riot act.

Situations like this have created the stereotypical picture of sales guys staking out the best corner of the showroom in order to survey the lot through a huge window. It always baffled me why most dealers in town had huge, glass-fronted storefronts and then plunked an office or two in each corner. That’s valuable customer-spying real estate! Perhaps they had Up Systems.

The most senior person on staff had his “watching spot”, so much so that there were literally wear marks on the ageing tiled floor where he stood, usually leaning on the bed of whatever pickup truck was parked in that part of the showroom. One occasion, the Lot Jockey put a small sedan in that spot instead of a pickup. It completely threw the senior for a loop.

“Where’s the truck? Why isn’t there a truck? Who put this car here?” were his rapid fire questions. Safe to say that he did not cope well with change.

If the appearance of a sedan caused confusion for his increasingly addled brain, the time that the Dealer Principal decided to have a “Secret Sale” caused him to have a minor coronary.

I think the intent of this sale was to create mystery and a sense of the unknown. This was years before social media, so print and radio ads were relied upon to advertise. No specifics were given; rather the promise was made of big savings and an abundance of selection of all the popular models. Not exactly unique, but different than what any other dealer was doing at that exact moment.

The part that was unique though, was when – as part of the whole secrecy theme – all the windows in the showroom were covered up with brown paper, like a present waiting to be unwrapped. I thought the senior salesman was going to lose his mind.

“Can’t see the lot! Everything’s covered up! Why would they do this? Maybe I can poke a small hole here...” he mumbled, sounding like Severus Snape before his morning coffee. An aggravated manager drove him away before he could destroy the paper.

The paper was taken down in a ceremonious reveal the next morning, leading to a successful sale if memory serves and the big windows transparent once again. If, as a customer, you ever pull onto a lot and see a couple of sales staff stationed at the storefront, you won’t have to wait long for service.

Chances are they don’t have an Up System.