You can usually pick up a supermarket’s own brand instant noodles for pennies. If you’re worried about not getting a varied diet, you can usually get chicken flavoured noodles, beef flavoured noodles, vegetable flavoured noodles… the list goes on. Nutrition is for people who drive rubbish cars.
Assuming the average person spends about £40 per week on food, living solely on noodles could save you about £37.50 per week. If you put that into a savings account, it’d take you less than four years to save for a Nissan Silvia S15.
Do you really need to shower every day? Dramatically reduce your water bills by halving the number of showers you take. If you’re concerned about smelling funky, pick up those tiny deodorant testers to cover the smell on your ‘days off.’
If you’re looking for a way to save water that’s a bit more fun and a bit less stinky, why not share your shower time with a friend? You shower two people with one shower’s worth of water, with the added bonus of getting to know your mate better than you ever expected…
It might mean getting up quite a bit earlier and getting home later, but these are the sacrifices we all have to make if we want to buy our dream car. In the UK, only 10 per cent of workers take the healthy option and walk to work, and by joining them you could make huge savings. The average UK worker pays £161 on commuting costs each month, so by walking to work it’d take you 92 years to save for a Ferrari 488GTB. I’m sure it’ll fly by.
Chances are you’ve got enough clothes to last you a lifetime. The only reason you want to buy new clothes is vanity. Put your ego to one side, and you’ll save heaps of cash. Assuming you save about £50 a month by not buying new clothes, you’ll have saved up for that BMW E46 M3 in about 13 years…
Once you get past the age of about 18, living with your parents becomes a bit of a chore. Once you get past 21, you’ll really, really want to move out. But living with your parents is cheap; rent will probably be way less than if you moved out and you’ll likely eat a lot more food than you financially contribute to… just be careful about saving cash using number three in this list if you do decide not to leave home.
The average UK rent is £899. Assuming your lovely parents let you get away with contributing half that for the pleasure of their company, it’d take you about two years to save up for a brand spanking new Toyota GT86.
During winter, heating bills can be a huge expense, especially if you live in a rickety old house that leaks heat quicker than your radiators can replace it. Save yourself the hassle of heating your home by putting on ALL THE LAYERS. The average annual heating bill in the UK is about £600, so by not heating your home for the next 17 years, you could buy your very own mk1 Ford Focus RS.
When is a phone not a phone? When it’s a mobile internet device, camera, and gaming system. Do you really need all of that? Ditch the smartphone, get yourself a bulletproof Nokia 3210, and you’ll save about £50 per month. Do that for the next 75 years, and you’ll have yourself a W204 generation Mercedes C63 AMG.
We’ve already established that by not showering you’re going to smell, so it’s probably not going to be long before your friends ditch you anyway. You might as well pre-empt this by ditching them first - who needs friends when you could be driving around in your dream car? And anyway, we all know having a friend in the car is unnecessary weight.
Assuming you’re quite the socialite and regularly spend £75 per week on going out, ditching your friends would mean you could pick up a good condition, manual Toyota Supra in just three years! So what are you waiting for? Be a loner!