CT Asks: The Mad & The Furious?

Have you ever had any car-related experiences that had you wanting to act out this scene from Falling Down, just to make a point?

After reading Jalopnik’s article about how one crazy pyjama-clad lady caused $4,000 worth of damage to a car dealership with a baseball, I began to think about occasions when wanton destruction was inflicted closer to home.

Business schools teach that it’s perfectly legitimate to be choosy with your customers, the point being that after-sale headaches may outweigh the profits of hooking the customer in the first place. The Law of Diminishing Returns, if you will. Rick, who bought a pickup truck from me, is an excellent example of this theory... if by excellent one means “an enormous douchebag and asshat”. Spellcheck hasn’t attempted to correct douchebag. Superb.

Nevertheless, I recall chasing Rick by both phone and as a “be-back” – a customer who is hot on a car and is expected to be-back later that day. The expectation for closing a be-back is high, so be warned if you return to a dealership after speaking to someone or test driving something a few days earlier. Chances are they’ll be all over you like a cheap suit. Be-back.

I sold Rick what ended up being a short lived sport edition of a particular rear drive vehicle that is no longer produced. For one year only, customers could choose this package which added unique tail lights, fancy stitching on the seats, and – here’s the key – a transmission made entirely out of glass. Rick didn’t like the last part.

Just about every customer who bought one returned within six months, their transmissions having been reduced to 10,000 bottle caps. Most people were pissed and understandably so, but accepted a loan car while their wheels were being repaired. Rick, however, chose a different tactic.

He blew into my office like a summer thundercloud ranting, raving, and generally frothing about the state of his vehicle. I accompanied him up to the service department where they did a bang up job of scheduling a repair and giving him keys to a loan car. Figuring all was well, I returned to my office and the stack of follow ups I was attempting to weed through.

Then the sudden noise of screeching tires filled the room, followed by the acrid stench of burnt rubber. Running out to the big glass windows, I was met by the senior salesman who was perpetually stationed there looking for customers on the lot. More staff quickly followed. We were all aghast.

In his rage, Rick had wedged his loan car up against a concrete wall and was, in what I can only imagine was first gear, proceeding to roast the tires on the little front wheel drive loan car. The noise was biblical. The smoke was thick. The Dealer Principal was angry.

Examples of this behaviour fill the internet. Most of us privately consider going ballistic, remind ourselves that it would be a bad idea to so do, and leave it there. That’s a good thing.

Have you ever had any car-related experiences that had you wanting to act out this scene from Falling Down, just to make a point? Share your experiences in the comments below.