A Man Has Pooped Into His Own Hand In A Car Dealership, Then Wiped It All Over A Brand New Car

There's really no way to bring this news to you delicately, so we'll give it to you straight: a man has been arrested after dropping a bum egg into his own hand, right in the middle of a car dealership, and then smearing a car with it

A man has smeared his own faeces down the side of a car right in the middle of a dealership – all because he was denied a financial reward for returning a set of allegedly lost keys.

Yep, that’s right: a 27-year-old human male, standing (or squatting) in a car dealership, actually curled one down into his own hand and then rubbed it along the side of a display car. The resident of Great Falls, Montana also punched a quarter panel of the car so hard he caused $1500 of damage. America is a wonderful place.

We don’t know which dealership or even which brand was involved (we’re using generic pics), but apparently after Bryce Steven Boos walked into the building and ‘returned’ some branded keys he says he found on the sidewalk, he asked for a reward – bad enough in itself.

Whether it was a GT-R or not, you'd be pretty upset...
Whether it was a GT-R or not, you'd be pretty upset...

For CTzens who aren’t British, asking for a reward after a good deed is, to us, one of the most uncivilised things a person can do, short of unloading your bowels into your furious grip and spreading yesterday’s breakfast all over a car.

Naturally, the police were called, at which point Boos freely admitted that he’d broken one off into his fist, smudged the world’s most heinous go-faster stripe down a brand new automobile and also punched a big dent in it. He then disputed that such things might be illegal. Clearly we’re not dealing with a stable individual, but at least he wasn’t carrying a gun.

The epilogue to this tale is that, after being cuffed and bundled into the back of a police car, Boos began beating his head repeatedly against the window until the cops had to remove him. He (oho!) faeces charges of felony criminal mischief, disorderly conduct and resisting arrest, and could even be locked up for 11 years. Talk about having a sh-t day…

Via: Great Falls Tribune

Comments

Anonymous

Stop the f**kin’ world, I’m getting off!!!

08/02/2017 - 11:05 |
9 | 0
Ben Ireland

This guy obviously watched too much Failrace, he wanted his own poo-mobile!

08/02/2017 - 11:06 |
125 | 2

I would be so happy if a comment mentioning FailRace would make it into next week’s Top Comments list :)

08/02/2017 - 16:35 |
13 | 3

That might be a way to get a poo mobile, but is certainly not a FailRace approved poo mobile XD

08/02/2017 - 20:45 |
46 | 0
Joshua Lue

How 💩

08/02/2017 - 11:07 |
1 | 0
Ali Mahfooz

This reminds me of the Top Gear episode where Jeremy Clarkson reads out the abusive comments from the Morris Marina Owner’s Club website about him burning a Morris Marina… in which he highlights his favorite, “If I see Jeremy Clarkson in the street, I’ll poo into my own hands and throw it at him!”.

I think we know who this person is. 😂😂

08/02/2017 - 11:11 |
76 | 2

marinas seem like nice cars tho

08/02/2017 - 12:46 |
4 | 0
RodriguezRacer456 (Aventador SV) (Lambo Squad)

In reply to by Ali Mahfooz

That same guy must’ve been taking drugs while on vacation here in the States and hallucinated that car as Clarkson.

08/02/2017 - 18:30 |
12 | 0
Anonymous

Boos does Poos on new VWs

08/02/2017 - 11:13 |
21 | 0
Anonymous

I have no words.

08/02/2017 - 11:14 |
1 | 0
Noah 7

What a crappy thing to do

08/02/2017 - 11:27 |
17 | 2
Anonymous

When I read because he was denied a financial reward I automatically thought ‘Murica.

08/02/2017 - 11:32 |
2 | 1
Joseph Le Corre

I reckon the dealer’s first words were: “Oh, sh*t it’s happened again.”

08/02/2017 - 11:49 |
5 | 2
Alex Webster

If it was a GTR, It would still be a com-poo-ter.

08/02/2017 - 11:52 |
62 | 0

👌😂

08/02/2017 - 19:28 |
17 | 0

Pfff!!!

08/03/2017 - 17:49 |
1 | 0

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