Do you like your American muscle cars as Detroit intended, or fiddled with, pumped up, and bad-assed? If you're one of the latter, this Ford Mustang could be right up your street. If not, you might want to grab a stress ball or do some breathing exercises. Sit this one out.
Hands up, I lied: this isn't a Ford Mustang. Not any more, anyway. Although this bears the perfectly proportioned bodyshell of a 1968 Fastback 'Stang, this is the ridiculously named Equus Bass 770.
Let's tear that apart. Equus? Isn't that a stage play that Harry Potter actor Daniel Radcliffe got his kit off for? Or Hyundai's idea of an S-class rival? Either way, it hardly screams attitude. What does do just that is 'Bass', written large across the car's arse. Not Boss. Bass. And the 770? You tell us.
No, I mean it. The engine isn't a 770-cubic inch, or a 7.7-litre. It's actually the 6.2-litre, supercharged V8 from a C6 Corvette ZR1, good for 631bhp and 605lb ft. Plenty of power, as you'll soon see, but why not badge the Bass as a 620, perhaps?
Anyway, you can have a six-speed manual shifter in the retro-modern Mustang interior, or a dual-clutch automatic. You get carbon-ceramic brakes, adaptive magnetic dampers, and new car tech like cruise control and LED lights.
How fast? Try a Ferrari 458 Italia-equaling 3.4sec to 62mph, and 200mph flat out. Just about quick enough to outrun the odd name, then.
Equus Automotive fancies its chances - this ain't no fly by night one-off. You'll pay £186,000 for your very own - also equal to a Ferrari 458, incidentally. Equus states the Bass 770 is 'a new American milestone in high-end automobile history'. Dang. So it's up there with Ferrari F40s and Bugatti Veyrons for benchmark quality then? We're quietly excited.
Anyway, here's a rather enjoyable mini-movie starring the Bass, some gratuitous burnouts, and more plot twists than a season of Breaking Bad. Enjoy.
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